IT’S NOT MY MOTHER! I SWEAR! My mother is a nice lady!
No, I am here today on behalf of my high school friend and roommate (we’ll call him Mr. McDoodlePants, to protect his bearded identity), a 24-year-old man who has the most bat-shit crazy, evil, abusive mother I have ever known. I don’t know much about his childhood aside from him insisting that it was normal. His dad had drinking problems, which is potent in his family (although when I get into the details of the mom, you won’t wonder much about why his dad drank), but his dad got dry completely. His brother is diagnosed psychotic and OCD to an extreme, so he lives at home in his late 20s early 30s (not sure specific age). The mother has to deal with the older brother on a daily basis this way, so many would say she deals with a lot and shouldn’t be put on the spot. Well, ladies and gentlemen of the internet, she does NOT deserve your sympathy.
These are all going to be little stories, true experiences I have had dealing (or being a witness to) my friend’s mother. To being, let us go back to the summer after my senior year. My roommate and all but one of my friends were a grade below me, and we had all decided we were going to drive to Hershey, PA and spend a weekend at the park. We got a hotel, set everything up, and went. Mr. McDoodlePants had told us he managed to convince his mother (who was adamantly against him going, despite being age 19 at the time) to let him come along, but asked someone to come pick him up on his road in the morning as she wouldn’t drive him and he didn’t want her to change her mind as he was leaving. I agreed, and picked him up down the road a bit and we were off for awesomeness.
That evening Mr. McDoodlePants gets a call on his cellphone. It’s his mother. She talks to him for 45 minutes, screaming so loud that we can all hear (and this is 9 kids spread across 2 bedrooms). She calls him immature, irresponsible, and ignorant for leaving her alone at her home. You know, because she doesn’t have a second son or a husband or anything. She says that he needs to be home to help her, and by help, I mean take care of her. Now this is a woman who can walk, talk, eat, sleep, bathe, raise 2 children, raise one child into his 30s, etc. She needs taking care of? Finally, Mr. McDoodlePants hung up. We advised him to keep the phone off, because she didn’t know where we were (we had not given her the hotel address or room number), so there was nothing to worry about. Wrong.
At 111:00pm she begins calling my boyfriend’s phone. He talks to her a couple times, and then gives up. She calls my boyfriend’s mother. She calls MY mother (a woman who is NEVER up past 10pm). She calls every parent of our group that she knows. They all tell her it’s fine. He’s among good kids, and we’re all responsible enough to take care of each other. She keeps telling them, “You don’t understand. He’s too immature, too irresponsible to be on his own. You don’t understand.” This is the same person who needs him home to take care of her. By 12:00am she managed to get the hotel room number and phone number from one of our parents. She begins calling the room non-stop. The phone will not stop ringing. We are pushed so far as to ask the front desk to turn the line off so we don’t have to listen. Then she goes back to calling my boyfriend’s phone. Mr. McDoodlePants dejectedly picks up. When he hangs up, he starts to cry. His mother is coming to get him. It’s almost 1am and she going to drive over an hour to take him home.
Upon arrival to the hotel, we also discover that she has not come to get him alone. She has forced her husband AND Mr. McDoodlePants’ brother to come with her, and she even forced her husband to drive. After the minivan comes to a final stop, Mr. McDoodlePants’ father steps out and walks up to Mr. McDoodlePants, who had walked out to meet him. Now note that it’s the FATHER who comes out. The father and son speak for about 3 minutes, the father turns back to the van, gets in, turns on, and drives away, leaving Mr. McDoodlePants standing in the parking lot. He came back to us and we asked the obvious. All he had to say was, “He asked if I was having fun and wanted to stay and I said yes, so he told me have a good time and left.”
This was my first main experience with Mr. McDoodlePants’ mother, and it was VERY mild.
Another random and quick example of her insanity is that she forced him quit his job while going to college. Not because his grades were slipping, not because she was worried he was overexerting himself. No, she demanded he quit his job because he, you guessed it, should be taking care of her.
Now this is getting long, and I’ve sworn off crazy long posts like the last one, so the rest of the story will come later. For those who have read this, what are your initial thoughts? Is she crazy? Is she wrong? Is she a bad mother? Post your thoughts, ideas for my roommate to cope with her incessant badgering, opinions or her or the situation as you understand it now, ask questions, etc. I want to get him some backup to stand up to her, so I thought I’d try here.